Wednesday, June 11, 2014

Happy Birth/Abandonment Day

 Have you ever lost something? My youngest daughter loses her phone all the time. Its never really "lost", just misplaced. I notice that how quickly she finds her phone depends on the urgency of her need with her phone. Sometimes it will go missing for days and when she decides she wants to text a friend or something she starts to look for it and its usually in plain site. My oldest daughter on the other hand reacts quite differently when she notices her cell phone out of her sight. It usually starts with a look of pure panic on her face as she feels her pockets and looks around her. Once she has established the phone is "lost" the whole world freezes until the phone is found, which is usually a few seconds since her phone is always by her side. lol
There is a difference between misplacing your cell phone and actually losing something. I remember a few years back I lost my dog. When I was about 11 years old I got a little winnie dog and I named him Yoshi. He was MY dog. When I got married and moved out I took him with me. I still had him through the birth of two of my children. He was our beloved family dog. I knew he was getting old and worried that he would pass soon. On halloween of 2005 Yoshi disappeared. We were heart broken. We looked everywhere for him. We printed out flyers and handed them out while we were trick or treating. I called the local shelter. I did everything I knew to do to find him. We looked for days. Days turned into weeks and we were still looking. Weeks turned into months and we came to terms that we probably weren't going to find Yoshi. How long can you really look for something you lost?
Maybe the answer to that question can be seen in my daughters and their "lost" cell phones. To Haley her phone is important to her. Its her form of communication and as an active teenage girl she needs to communicate with friends, teacher,coaches and her parents. When I asked her why her phone is important to her she said "it's my communication to the world and without it I feel like a piece of me is missing!"She is extreme, I know, lol. Emily on the other hand usually just plays games on her phone. She has filled the memory with pics so she can't use the camera unless she deletes the pics. She only texts a few friends and that is rarely. Her phone is of little importance to her. She is much more concerned about her stuffed unicorn, Fluffy. Maybe the length of how long you look for what you have lost depends on the importance of the missing object to the person who is trying to locate it.

36 years ago today I lost something and I am still looking for it. On June 12, 1978  I was born in an unknown location that was approximately somewhere within 3 hours of the Tulsa County Fairgrounds. I don't know who gave birth to me, who delivered, or the time of my birth. I know that my umbilical cord was tied with a twisty tie from a bread sack. I also know that there must have been complications at birth because I have been diagnosed with cerebral palsy, which is caused by lack of oxygen at birth. I was left in a phone booth at the Tulsa State Fairgrounds within a few hours after my birth. I got the privilege of chatting with one of the officers who found me. He told me that he was working a stake out that day close to the fairgrounds when he got the call that there was a baby at the fairgrounds. He said  they turned on the sirens and got to me in less than 5 minutes. From there I was taken to the hospital. The doctors said I appeared to be 4 hours old and in good health.

I don't know how long I was in the hospital or what happened when  I was there. I do know that the Tulsa County Sheriff's department was investigating. The PD named me Maybelle. They said it was fitting since I was found in a Ma Belle telephone booth.  An anonymous source called the PD and told them that I was stolen from my ailing mother.
. The newspapers also said that a woman called the PD and the hospital numerous times asking about my condition and said "take care of my baby, take care of my baby.

After the anonymous caller told the police  I was taken from my mother the PD released that they would not press chargers against her if she came forward. An investigator told the Tulsa World that he felt confident the mother would come forward. But she never did. 

I don't know how long I was in the hospital or where I went after I was released. I have been told that I was in foster care for 6 months. I don't know who I lived with or how many families had me before I was adopted at 6 months. 

These newspaper articles are the only pictures that I have of myself before 6 months of age. These newspaper articles are also the only thing that I have to put the pieces of the puzzle together. I would love to be able to get the reports of the investigation from the Tulsa County Sheriff's office, but it's not that easy. 

There are so many things that I don't know about that day 36 years ago. I am praying that someday I find the answers that I seek. Over the past few months I thought  I was getting close and for a short time I thought I had finally found what I was looking for. All roads have led to dead ends and I am not sure if  I will ever find my biological family. 

I know that someone knows what happened that day. A young man called the Tulsa County Sheriff's department as an anonymous source and gave them information about me. I really thought that if my story was shared enough someone with information that could help me would come forward. That has not happened yet. 

I sit here 36 years later in the same town  I was abandoned in. I think this is my first birthday I have spent in this town. I am going to ask everyone who reads this to please share it. Share it everywhere you can. Everytime its shared there is a chance my biological mother/family member will see it. What a wonderful birthday present it would be if my biological mother would see this today of all days. 

Thank you so much to everyone for your support over the past few months. You all have helped me so much! I have no new news to report. I haven't heard anything from Troy Dunn and no new leads came from the news report.  I still remain hopeful. I know it is all in God's timing.  How long do I keep looking?  I will keep looking for as long as it takes. Like my oldest daughter Haley said about her cell phone, " I feel like there is a piece of me missing." No time can be put on this for me. I will keep looking.  Can you imagine still looking for the same thing for 36 years? 

Psalms 139:13-16 For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. My frame was not hidden from you when  Iwas made in that secret place, when I was woven together in the depths of the earth. Your eyes saw my unformed body; all the days ordained for me were written in your boo before one came to be.

God wrote the story of my life before any of it came to be. I am praying chapter 36 answers a lot of questions from the past chapters.